Month: November 2020

Receiving And Living the Gift Of Cancer

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Q: About two years ago I found I had cancer. The first night was so difficult, a shock. Towards the morning I was in an emotional upheaval, and then I touched a very deep space of being. I found peace I had never known before, and knew the way to heal my self. I knew everything was okay. I was quiet, at peace and there was this inner joy.

John: You received the gift.

Q: Yes, this is exactly how I felt: it was a gift, and from the voice I heard inside of my heart I chose to heal my self in a natural way. I went through a deep fear of death and met the same being, the same peace, the same loving presence I cannot describe in words.

John: Living the gift is worth more than living. 

Q: Today I can receive this gift more and more, and that state of being that you talk about exists inside of me most of the time. The shift from the old me to the new is so great. My connection to my being is so deep, yet my physical health has not changed.

John: That’s fine. You have the better part: living the gift. Take care of your body without distraction from living the gift. 

Q: You mean taking care of my body regardless of circumstances, even if I hadn’t received the gift?

John: Receiving the gift awakens you to a different level of your body. Living the gift means that you’re living from within that level of your body. 

Q: What does it mean to live from that other physical level?

John: Instead of receiving the gift and having the gift, you are living being the magicalness of the gift. 

From there, take care of the body that you are used to. The body you’re taking care of isn’t the same as the body you’re coming from. The care makes the difference. Trying to make your body better doesn’t make the difference. 

Your care of your body from within the magicalness of the gift is what you love, and it is what makes the difference. 

You’re going to die sometime. Live the gift until you die. Living the gift is your life until you die.  If you’re not living the gift, you’re filling your life with what is sort-of-dead until you die. 

After you have died, you will understand all of this perfectly. Until then, you know. 

Q: This experience of the being, the love, the great “thank you” in my heart that I feel … and the external reality … if they all bring about the magic in my life, does that mean that I’m living the gift?

John: When the gift in your living means more to you than living, you’re living the gift, and when you die, you will die how you’ve lived. 

It is all good. Believe it. Believe it because you already know.

Healing Inflamed Sensitivity: A Conscious Return To Your Heart

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Q: When I was very young, I got lost on a crowded beach and was separated from my family. I remember feeling very frightened, alone and disconnected from other people. I realize that ever since that time I’ve continued to feel that way: frightened, alone and disconnected. I feel if I could connect with you it would help.

John: You have a delicate makeup, and when you became separated from your parents and you felt lost, you registered that separation through your sensitivity. That took you up further into your self, and it’s your heart that you were separate from. 

That experience created the pathway that as soon as something affects your self, you register it in your sensitivity. You follow the same path that you did the first time. You go up into your self and you separate from your heart.

The next time that this happens with you, realize your well-worn path in your self and, instead of holding to that pattern and that path, consciously be gentled and quieted in your heart, regardless of how you feel in your self.

This isn’t to change your experience. Being gentled and quieted in your heart changes you. There, you, awareness, are relaxed, at home in your heart. All of your sensitivity in your self is still there, but without you aggravating it. It will take some time for that sensitivity to heal. 

You can deal with anything in your self as long as you don’t separate from your heart. When you’re not in your heart, you’ll use your self to magnify your experience. Instead of listening to your sensitivity, love listening to your heart.

You have that sensitivity to read your environment, to attune to your environment, but you’ve been using it to read how you feel in your self. You take all your sensitivity back to your sensitivity. You don’t need your sensitivity for you to be in your heart.

Use your sensitivity in the way that you would use a tool, where it has an understood, practical use. Use it to read and see what’s taking place in your environment. When you make your sensitivity about your self, your sensitivity becomes inflamed. 

When you are in your heart, your sensitivity settles. You need to give it the space to settle. That means that you’re not using it; you’re not using it in your self or on your self.

Concerning your self, instead of using your sensitivity, use your heart in your self.  Apply being in your heart to the self that you’re in instead of applying your sensitivity, and you’ll be fine.

Q: Thank you.

The Magicalness Of What You Really Are

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Q: When I’m open, there’s such a deep longing to fully let go of all of my protective layers and walls but I’m not sure how. When I feel my self letting go it’s as if my world is flipped upside down, and my physical body can’t handle it. I close because I feel so out of control.

John: Your mind and your nervous system are, through their conditioning, made of all of the holding. So even though you love the openness, even just a thought of letting go of everything that is closed alarms your mind and your nervous system. In referencing it, you empower it. Instead, know your deepest, most quiet love and, as openness, move in it. 

There isn’t any letting go. There is just you opening even more.  

The openness is your love. You engage a letting go because of your love, but the letting go isn’t your love. The pure openness is your love. Engage that openness, and everything of a holding pattern in your nervous system, in your mind, in your self, dissolves because it no longer has a power supply. All of your power is going to what you really are. 

Being your love empowers your love. How to be in it is by being the same as it is. From within this openness in you, you are free to love. There isn’t anything for you to let go of. There isn’t anything to take apart or dismantle. There is really only your openness, and that openness moves as love. In that, you are free; in anything else you’re not free. 

Let go of what holds your self together, and that letting go will always still be holding something together. It really helps, but it isn’t completely it. The short cut, the immediate, what has in it no process, is you directly shifting into your real core. 

You being that core is the whole of your life, in the midst of all that you’ve called your life. In this way you are being what you are after you have died, while you live. 

What you are – not who you are, but what you are – is from way, way beyond this planet and you are really here. Who you are is something that you have adopted, but what you are is real. There is value in who you are but that value comes only from what you are. 

In being what you are despite who you are, the magicalness of what you really are infuses all of who you are. Who you are becomes seen form of what you are.

That makes what you are in this world, visible.

The Marriage Of The Drop And the Ocean

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Q: I feel such openness in every cell of my body. Why am I not falling like a drop into the ocean?

John: Because the drop has investments not in the ocean. The drop has things that matter to it that are not in the ocean.

When as the drop you enter the ocean, everything that was yours as the drop will belong to the ocean. When as the drop you go into the ocean, you and all that’s yours is given into the ocean. 

You have personal concerns about things in your life. You have personal concerns about how your self and your life are configured. Those concerns protect you from entering.

Q: Does that depend on my action, or is it something that happens by itself?

John: When you drop into what you know to enter, when you enter the door, you say “yes” to whatever that may possibly mean later to your self and to anything in your life. Whatever it is that you’ll know as you enter the door, you’ll let take full effect in your self and in your life, whatever that may mean. 

It’s like a marriage. Everything that belongs to you, the drop, is freely given into all the ocean, and everything that is in the ocean is freely given into all of you, the drop. So as soon as you have even a little concern, it makes you wonder if you should marry … if you should marry the ocean. 

As the drop you can keep whatever you like, but then you can’t marry the ocean.

Q: Why is it so scary? 

John: It’s only scary for consideration. When you consider your self it’s scary, but when you’re listening to what you know, all there is is love.

When you are in love, it freely takes you. You have no considerations. All you are is in, and yes, your self and your whole life will change. It will all belong to what you’re in. You’ll use all of it for what you’re in. It’s as big a change to your life as death.

Q: I do feel it is like death. It’s been coming for a while and it scares me so much, even though I know that what is scared is my mind.

John: You are scared inside of your investments, but your investments in your self and in your life are not your love. 

Q: Does it help to have physical distance from all the stories? I feel that my investments are around me all the time. 

John: It would help you a little, but without you being just deeply, quietly, clear and given, you’ll re-create the energy of those investments elsewhere.

Q: I can see that. So it’s just going sweetly inwards.

John: Sweetly in.

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